Come with me to the sea of love. I want to tell you how much i love you. Do you remember when we first met…
Remember those days when the beginning of the relationship is at it’s highest bliss. Sometimes i wish those days would last forever. The feeling of being loved everyday. I’m sure its like that to some people who have longer relationships and to those who just got married or have been married for a long time. The reason why i say this is that the bliss is dissolving, to a point where we do our own thing more often than we do together when tyler and i first met. I mean we love each other so much, but i guess we love each other too much in fact that we just started doing our own thing. I miss all the bliss. I mean there is still some there when we goof around and make each other laugh. But other than that its just not spending time together. We sit at our computers in the same room, but its just not the same. Is this how married couples are? I was never raised around a family that is married, my mom and dad were never married but yet at the same time my dad is an alcoholic. So i don’t really know what the meaning of love is. The way most kids find out about love is through media. I mean i love my family and tyler and his family. But the love i have for tyler is more than anything else. I guess what i’m asking is…how do i express that love without being over powering that he can’t take it any more or find it really annoying. It’s hard to keep up with this. Just scared to lose him. Is that too much? I’m in a mood where i keep thinking that i might lose him and how terrible that would effect me. Just like i get in moods where i keep thinking how i would deal with a close family or friend death. like cope with it. I don’t know how i would be. Never experienced a death of a loved one. Not even a pet. *knock on wood* It just hurts thinking about that.
sorry to bring you down or make it sound like i’m crazy and that i don’t know what i’m talking about. OR just plain boring.
Just want to share how i feel. Which is really hard to explain both on here and to people.
Tyler, if you are reading this. I love you so much and no other love nor words can explain how much i really, really love you. You are the one person that changed my life and saved me from going to my darkest moment in life. I know that i may be out of control and add chaos to some situations. I really want to make you happy. You are my missing puzzle to my life. My other half. My soul mate. I know none of this makes sense. like always. But you mean a lot to me, my family, and even my little brother. I don’t like the feeling of knowing that there could be a possibility of losing you. Love doesn’t have end. Not everything ends. Somethings last forever and i hope that our love for each other does last forever. I love you with all my heart no matter what.
and forever will
